Well it's not bad. That's for sure. As far as story goes it's cliche sure, but this has potential on its own. It's a well executed cliche. The hero seems like a cookie cutter macho older badass type. Learn a little thing called character development, its everything friend. On the tech side of things, fix your audio first. A old friend once told me "a audience will walk out of a movie with bad sound much quicker than a movie with bad visuals. Your shots, are pretty interesting though, that's definitely the strength here.
Keep up the good work, and thanks for the art!